I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
