By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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