Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize