i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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