U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
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