I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
