my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize