I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Randomize
