I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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