"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
it was like eating out sand paper
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
