ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
