just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
it's like iHOP with fire
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Randomize
