Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
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