Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
