He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I was not drunk enough for that final.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
