omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Randomize