And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
