love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Randomize
