You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
that's an acceptable place to lick
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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