I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Randomize
