You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Randomize
