roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
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