sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Randomize
