wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize