I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
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