taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
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