Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Randomize
