I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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