Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
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