So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
