drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Randomize
