hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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