can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
