it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I need moral support for this bender
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Randomize
