Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
