I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize