But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
Sorry about my life...
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize
