I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
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