My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
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