Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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