She's JV to your varsity
I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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