That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize