I met the friendliest cop last night
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Randomize
