Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Can I color on your dick again?
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Randomize
