if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
I have demons in me.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
areolas are like halos for boobs.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
