Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
