I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
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