so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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