He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Randomize
