How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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