Come see our sink grown plant.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
